abolish the concept of ‘passing’ & start accepting that theres no specific way any gender has to look to be valid
"The thing with "passing" is it prioritizes cis people and their perception of gender over trans lives [and] also tacitly encourages the gendering of strangers." [via]
my shoulder has pretty much stopped being a functional shoulder. it’s my drawing shoulder. i am so scared for my future. what happens if it gets worse? what happens if my elbows and wrists get worse and i can’t draw anymore? what happens if i lose the ability to make art or take pictures? who will i be if i can’t do the things i love?
i think this could be identified as mixed mood. i’m super anxious and, like, hyper focusing on things. and everything is over stimulating me. and i’ve got a weird type of energy that’s good for absolutely nothing but self destructive behaviour. i feel foggy and bright at the same time.
i want to be healthy. i want to be able to wake up and have an idea what i’m going to be like that day. i want to feel like i know myself. i want to have control over my actions and thoughts. i want to feel safe in my own head.
i hate this. the only things that will ever possibly help are medication and exercise, but both of those things just make me more miserable and put me in significantly more pain. i hate this. i hate this. i hate this.